I lie in yet another hotel room, lazily scanning through a book in a bid to relax after the day’s work, my mind half on the text, half on my treasure who yet again has to accept the promise of toys and more chocolates for mummy’s absence. It is truly difficult. Every good bye, every call to touch base to ascertain that he is okay. The debate of if to call three – four times, to tell him how much you miss him, or just call once, and not enhance the pain of the distance. At points like these, I’m not quite sure who needs the reassurance more; Him, that mom loves him, and really doesn’t want to be away; or Me, that he isn’t vexed, and understands why this is the life that we live.
Being a parent isn’t a plate of fried rice. No matter the books you read, and experience you’ve had with younger siblings, it doesn’t quite cut it like having your very own, for which you are responsible. This living, breathing, writhing being, which you have to nurture, crop sometimes, and groom to be an upstanding member of society. The kicker for me though is this - what happens to the yearning, writhing, (truly) living dreams inside you which desire to take advantage of the opportunities that present themselves? I’d truly love an answer.
For every opportunity missed in growing your ‘you’, so ‘He’ can grow, is a little seed of resentment planted? If yes, what fruits will it yield? How do you ‘joyfully’ play on slow mo’ knowing that time is also ticking for you, especially in today’s fast paced technology driven world. It’s a hard trade off that shouldn’t be asked of anyone.
Loving your precious jewel, I believe also requires loving you. Allow yourself growth opportunities, become someone they can boast of, be proud of, look up to. The ideal of that equal split down the middle of work-life balance is a myth; it’s more a zigzag between the two points. That being said, even while taking opportunities, and earning the ‘bread’ that takes care of the ‘stead’, remember it’s all because of the young’uns, who have been entrusted to your care. No sitting on your ass, hoping things will fall in place, being mediocre, under the umbrella excuse of ‘am a single parent…I’ve no one to help.’ Don’t beat yourself up because you’ve to work and there’s no significant other to help support watch the kids, or bring home the bacon, and reduce your need to work. Being a parent is just one of your identities, go out and maximize opportunities; God gave, God watches, God is WILLING AND ABLE TO HELP!
Love Them, Love You.
Be Productive, Be Golden!
D2AGE
