Sango or Yahweh. Part Two - The Realisation

As parents, you pass on tradition, pass on your beliefs, and form cultures. You were brought up going to church, so you take your child to church. You believe in an altruistic creator. So you tell and convince your child(ren) to believe as you do. You think it would be great to inculcate certain habits in them, so you embark on repetitive behaviors that form cultures, which would mold this individual into the ideal society participant. In the whole interplay of your molding and forming, you forget the one crucial thing that can undo or cement all you’re forming. The experiences the children go through. Their understanding, and reaction to these experiences. Why else would you have PK’s becoming nude pop singers? Going so far left from the apparent cultures and beliefs that they were brought up with?

This realization plagued me. Even as I awaited God’s defense of Himself, curious about how it will come, wondering if perhaps He meant for me to help Him. I sought out answers from family and friends, but none had an answer that satisfied me, that I felt confident will answer my inquisitive 7 going on 70-year-old angel.

Several days go by and am watching and wondering. Then it happened. It was Little Man’s turn to lead evening devotion. We finished reading and explaining the totally unrelated passage, and it’s time for him to pray. He says the usual gratitude and requests and then with a heavy pause that makes me peep at him, he goes - “Am sorry God for being angry with you, I won’t be angry anymore, and I still Love you”.

God doesn’t need our help, doesn’t need to defend Himself, because He just IS. Confronted by the awesomeness of His Love and Grace, you can’t help but fall in Love. He showed me, that you don’t need the theological exposure, education or experience. He can still be EXPERIENCED by even a baby who can’t speak or explain. HE IS.

The parenting thing is a bit harder for the single parent. Wondering if we are doing the right thing or if our words are resonating and forming ethical characters. Sometimes the self-doubt just seeks to bury you. You don’t always get an answer to your questions and prayers, or at least not in the way you want; but for me, this reminder was all I needed. HE IS, and HE CARES. My trust therefore, is not in the arm of flesh, not even my own, strong and hardworking as I may be. My only boast is in the sufficiency of HIM WHO MAKES ALL THINGS BEAUTIFUL IN HIS TIME!

Hence for me and my house hold, IT’S YAHWEH ALL THE WAY!

Golden Child of a Golden GOD.

D2AGE

SANGO OR YAHWEH?

My Angel is at it again. Melting my heart just the way only he knows how. Very recently, his school held their annual inter-house sports, and little man was so excited to be representing his house in several activities. Now some parents, do the whole “It’s just for fun, so let’s go laugh and have a good time”. For me, there should be excellence even in fun, and I do admit, I go overboard in the whole competitive spirit sometimes. We had been practicing racing in sacks, filling baskets and short dashes all week in the bid to score all gold medals.

Friday morning dawns bright and fair, and anticipation is at the peak, for all the medals we were going to collect. First event, performance was first from the last. Second event, not much different from the first, third event, Oh Gosh, somebody help me now, my sweet baby broke down in tears. To be fair, his competition were older and he did give it his very best.

Of course, at this point, I had to switch gears, and encourage him to “just have fun”. The good-natured ribbing from the parents around smarted, and we decided we’d cool it off with cone ice-creams! Nothing in life is that serious jare! The parents’ activity comes up, and I sign up for some good old fun. Other mom’s like myself struggle through the task of tying a tie, and I manage to come second! Ah! See beefing! I almost wanted to reject the gift, so Angel doesn’t feel bad.

“This is totally unacceptable! I did four events and got nothing! You did just one and got a gift! I can’t believe it! I didn’t even win one!” Am laughing, because it is just ridiculous! Thinking he is also having fun with the whole situation. Next thing I hear “Mom, am changing my religion” HuH?! “To what?” I ask, half in jest, half serious, trying to keep up with his mind. “Am changing to traditional, cos I prayed to God, and asked for help in my races, and He didn’t Help me!”

How do you explain to a child, whom you have taught, that sometimes, you don’t get an answer from the all-powerful, all Loving God, whom he must respect, and worship. I was at a loss. This wasn’t a moment for jokes anymore, and for the life of me, I couldn’t come up with a befitting answer. 
It’s a fragile thing - a child’s trust. Innocently given, innocently expectant. How does it blossom, under the harsh realities of life’s disappointments? How many other silent prayers offered and unanswered does he harbor a disappointment for? How do I convince him again, that there is a God, who is concerned about the little things that concern him? What can I do but hand over the matter to God, to well, stand up for Himself!

Did He stand up for Himself? Is Angel going to be a Sango Worshipper? Read the 2^nd part to find out!

Life Can Be Simply Golden

D2AGE

Like Fine Wine...

LIKE FINE WINE...IT GETS BETTER WITH AGE

WHY IT’S BETTER TO DATE A MATURE LADY

By definition, a mature lady is someone who by society definition is past the first bloom of youth, when you hit the big 3 decades, and you stop saying your age at your birthday drinkies. It also includes single mom’s, who though hot, fresh, sweet, nice…bear the extra scars from the journey to and fro the labor room.

These women are passed over, for the “sweet, fresh under 25’s” which have the fresh flush of youth, excitement, and adventurousness of the young and hot blooded. The common belief is that this ‘omalicha’s’ hold an advantage to the older set, because they are mostly assumed to be unsullied, perky, and idol worship the boo. Elevating him to god status.

I get it, who doesn’t like to be worshiped, and gazed upon with huge doe-like eyes, hanging onto every word, like you are the best thing right before grandma’s jollof rice. But hold on, even gods get exhausted with all the hero worship because after all the worship comes the requests!

The mature lady is better, and here are my arguments:

1)      Maturity lends her understanding. She is more understanding of your quirks and flaws, and more forgiven too. She’s been around the block a few times to know that the ‘god’ has clay feet.

2)      Singleness for the extended period has grown her appreciation. She knows what it takes to come home, arrange fuel for the gen, change the light bulbs, repair the plumbing, put water in the car, check oil, and all those little things that she has to do, grudgingly while protecting her manicure. So the ‘god’ is willing to do all those little nothings? Darn straight she’s grateful. It’s a big deal for her, compared to the little chit’s who wonder what the heck is taking so long?!

3)      She’s independent. And that’s a good thing. You can work, without worrying about her moping because she doesn’t have your attention. You can go 3-4 hours, without checking in cos you know she’s got her game and can handle business. Isn’t going to call you and say, “Honey, power is back on and there’s a whirring sound coming from the laundry room, can you come check it out?”

4)      Family blues? With a mature lady, you’ve got it sweet. They are happy and grateful that their sister/daughter finally got involved, so they make extra effort to make you happy, and not ‘stress’ the relationship with demands. They work extra hard to ensure you are accommodated and content.

5)      A mature single lady doesn’t need to work hard. She works smart. And am not talking computers or admin here. Am talking behind closed doors, car back seats, and deserted locker rooms. She knows just what to do, how to do, to get you…

6)      If she’s got a child, good for you. You get insurance that the tools work (it’s a great big deal, check Bar Beach if you disbelieve me). Then you get to practice Daddy, on some other person’s child, so you become perfect for your own. Readymade family, that you slide neatly into.

7)      The single mature lady has found Spirituality. She’s spent some time in spiritual exercises and is more discerning. She’s gonna war room all over you! Your trips are covered, business deals sealed, your life surrendered to God Almighty.

Just one caveat, the single mature lady hasn’t got time to waste. If you don’t wanna be serious, keep stepping. This one interprets/completes “Let's take a walk” for “down the Aisle”

After all said and done, the main thing anyone should check when choosing a partner is: "What are her/his values?" This person is going to be a role model for your kids. What do they believe, what intentions fuel their actions? You can't gloss over this. If you don't know what values to hold dear, then please hold on and discover the man in the mirror.

Golden Life...

D2AGE