Monday 29 August 2016

HANG UP YOUR HANG UPS!!!


“God will effect justice! How can he just abdicate responsibility?! Fatherhood isn’t an accidental discharge! It’s a lifelong commitment to supporting and caring for his child!”
“I gave him a child! Made him a father for the first time! Such an invaluable gift! And he sends me peanuts for upkeep! I’ll make him pay!”
…and plenty such statements that show the big chip we carry on our shoulders. It's not reserved for single mom's alone, so please don’t snigger and please get off your high horse, we ALL do have hang-ups! Am just focusing on the single parents because well, that’s what this blog is about!
I chatted with a friend recently, and he gave me a narration of hell endured at the hands of woman, who got pregnant for him, and railroaded him to marry her. Fast forward to today, marriage has packed up, and babe has major hang-ups! “You won’t see your child!” You must pay big bucks child and mom support,” and all such declarations, basically all pointing to the one BIG CHIP OF ALL – YOU OWE ME AND YOU’LL PAY!
I smile when I hear statements that indicate this major hang up. I do not belittle the pain and effort that goes into training a child, much less alone. It’s major! I should and do know! From the financial to the emotional, moral and yes of course Nigerian mom that I am, spiritual! Midnight prayers and fasting on top his cute head! Lol! That being said, however, that effort shouldn’t emanate from a place of bitterness. I get it. He promised you heaven, delivered you hell, not even earth. He just totally abdicated responsibility, when you assumed you had a partner in for the long haul. He does something, but can do more, yet refuses to! He… he… he….! 
Give it a break already! While you’re busy filling your heart with anger, hate, and bitterness, life is going on. Yup! Every minute, of every hour, of everyday. All your griping hasn’t changed the seasons, neither has it changed him, but someone IS changing. YOU! You’re forgetting how to smile. How to be gracious. How to be generous, how to give without an expectation.
You’re giving out of love to that cute baby that’s yours, that looks up to you, has no one but you, and loves you unconditionally! NOT the loafer that left you in the lurch!
Babe, e do. Hang up that Hang up! Do you. If you can still find you underneath all the pent up anger and frustration. Think instead of the gift you’ve been blessed with. For children are exactly that -  A heritage of the Lord, a reward from Him (Psalm 127 vs 3-4)
Allow no Dross, Be Golden…

D2AGE

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